Soooo….I joined a dating website. Seriously, I did. Now I’m not going to tell you which one, cuz once I tell you about it you’re sooo going to want to go and join. But I don’t want you to. Because you’ll be all grabby and snatch up the good ones for yourselves. You’re greedy like that. And I’m selfish and immature like this.
Now this dating site is Not your old stupid ‘Match.com’ or ‘eHarmony’…no sirree-bob. This place is super special. You have to have certain QUALIFICATIONS to join. Yeah, ya get that? You gotta be QUALIFIED.
This is what is referred to as a Niche market, sweetie, and I’m Niching the hell outta it.
The QUALITY you must possess to be in this ‘market’ has nothing to do with how sex-alicious you are…or how strongly your Mensa flag flies. Nope. It doesn’t matter if you make 6 digits a year…or if you’re a twin. No one cares about that shit…At. All.
Nope…the only thing that qualifies you to be in this group is that you have your very own section in the DSM 5. That’s right~! You gots ta be crazy to BELONG. The buggier, the better.
I like dating the mentally ill. Nothing is more fun than going on a manic joyride with a bipolar who has forgotten to take his Risperdal. Seriously, you can’t make this crap up. And if you get super lucky and meet a Dissociative? Girl, that’s some heavenly shit…just think, you could, at any moment be in bed with four or five different people…and NOT be a slut~! YeeHaw~!
And of course, if you like to play ‘hide & seek’…no one is better than a Schizophrenic. They are Super at disappearing…or just finding really awesome hiding places where not even the CIA satellites can find them. Never…I’m telling you…NEVER a dull moment with a Schizo.
Of course all of this helps if you’re Bipolar, like me. Then you get the inside scoop…the secret codes to how to date one of these most fantastical types.
Oh…one more fun thing about this site is that everyone…almost every single person is either an artist or a super geek. The much pondered connection between brilliance and insanity really struts its stuff here…And EVERY one is a walking med encyclopedia. WebMD has nothing on this site. Fuck Yeah~!
Now off I go to the Chat room…I never know what anyone is talking about, but I’m in city government, so along with being Bipolar, I’m kind skilled at making sense outta nonsense.
MY MASK:
